32 Feet of Reflection

Thirty minutes ago kids were running around, laughing, climbing, and working on developing their group skills a mere 32 feet below my feet. It is still. It is peaceful. In a building that houses a program that depends on life, movement, and energy I find it ironic that in this moment, it is the stillness of the building, the silence, that provides clarity. It is in these moments that I realize that God had this all planned out for me.
My staff had just left and I had to make one last climb into the framework of the building to check on the, slow forming, ice tower. I quietly ascended and when i reached the top I traversed a log, which is 32 feet in the air. When I reached the end of the log there is a four foot jump from the log to the top of the climbing wall which I have floated across a hundred times before. I transferred my safety equipment. Double Check. Jump. There is no looking back, only moving toward my next goal. I open the hatch door that gives me access to a platform situated on the rear of the building. The moment the door opened I went to work attaching prussiks to steady the tubing and balance the flow of water dripping on the ice. When I finished I stopped and just stared at the dark world that surrounded my little window in the building. The moon provided enough light to see the silhouette of the trees against the bluish black starry night. In that instant I felt contentment and was pleased with my life. Thankful. Cheerful. Appreciative of the blessings bestowed.

The silence was harshly interrupted by the ring of the office phone. I quickly made my way to the edge of the wall. I connected the rappel device and off I went back toward solid ground. One of my staff had called to make sure I had safely returned to the ground. As I locked the door and walked toward my car I was quietly inspired by the stillness of the gentle snowflakes barely able to reach the ground. I was glad that my staff had called to check on my safety. I know that I have been prepared for this position. For whatever length of time or purpose I am content with continuing to challenge and change the lives of the students I work with. I have also been provided with an excellent staff. Tonight was a reminder of that. They are all showing a great deal of improvement, ability, and caring for the many aspects of the job they have been chosen for. Again I see no coincidence that they are the ones who are supporting me. They found a few pictures of my first year on the job. An 18 year old recent high school graduate ready to learn and teach and grow. I was young but the pictures remind me that I don't know where I will be seven years down the road, but something is guiding my way, thats for sure. Who knows what tomorrow brings? All I know is today was good and I look forward to whatever tomorrow has in store. I took the liberty of posting two of the photos that my staff thought were worth putting up on the bulletin board at work. Looking forward to whatever is to come. Up Rope!

Beneath the wall

This is the hardest part of the winter. I am trapped. The weather has not provided enough consistency for ice climbing and for the most part it is not worth the trip to drive somewhere for a weekend of rock climbing. I fill my down time with guitar strumming, reading and mindless web surfing. Sure it is a great opportunity to reflect and appreciate the exciting times but I long to be hanging from the side of a rock with hundreds if not thousands of feet of air between me and the ground. I have also been extremely busy with work. I have been training my staff which have been great but we have a long way to go. On top of new staff we started new counseling groups at work. I enjoy the groups but I am being stretched by being the sole person in charge especially of drug and alcohol groups. It truly puts me in my place and grounds me. Which at times is defeating because, as I mentioned, I would love to be up high on the rock right now. I have had some time to climb at work and set some new routes. The youth in adventure club along with my staff seem to really enjoy the new routes that are put up weekly.

On a different note, I slightly rearranged my apartment and I was surprised at how one minor adjustment made it feel more comfortable and calm. I moved my small table, which i eat and work at, from the carpeted living area to the edge of my kitchen area. I have a 12 x 12 tiled kitchen area with a lot of open space. In fact I am sitting at the table right now and it is more relaxing because the apartment feels less cluttered. Funny how minor changes in our lives can have a profound impact on our perception of things. This is a pretty random post but for the time being I have nothing else to write. My mind is shot from giving my all to the youth were I work and physically I am pretty worn out from lifting and climbing at work. Stay posted though, being cooped up for to long leads to creative ways of producing adventuresome activities. Hoping to be on belay soon! Signing off.